Yet another evening at the Bridge Club. I take my seat at a table where a conversation is already in progress. One guy - who I think of as the comedian of our club - marks my entrance with one of his trademark, grand sweeping statements: "...but Prashanth, he plays to win!" Much amused, I comment, "Of course! Don't we all?" Judging by the expressions around the table, it was the wrong answer.
Now, there happen to be a lot of people at our club who have far more playing experience than me; and yet, they do not bother to learn or play complicated partnership conventions; they do not make or figure out deceptive plays; they do not read advanced playing tips from books. But for me, those things are like bread and butter, for without them, you will remain at best an average player even if your basic technique is sound. I do play to win. And not just in bridge. It's an in-built urge to be competitive and be a winner; be it academics or games.
But many people just play to have fun, and it doesn't matter whether they win or lose. I wish I could be that way; but I wince every time I make a mistake, and I feel a little unhappy if I lose badly. Yet, I still wear my smile, because I know I just learnt one more lesson! I adore my partners who explain my mistakes and teach me the way to avoid them; but they are not as well-liked by others, for I've heard statements like a rueful "He lectures!" or a semi-jesting "He's a meanie!"
The interesting trend I noticed here is that the younger (relatively speaking: people in their fifties come under this category in bridge!) people are more competitive than the older players. Perhaps this is a sign of things to come. Everybody wants to win these days. And yet, I do not see it as a bad thing. To not strive to do better is to be less than human, in my opinion.
I'm sure there is a line somewhere that separates the competitive from the over-competitive. But many people draw it at the wrong place. "Being competitive" is no excuse for a transgression of ethics; but "Being over-competitive" is no excuse for mediocrity.
Cheers,
Prashanth.
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7 comments:
hmmm
~alraqs
?
Hmm..
I read this earlier but somehow didn't comment..
I have the same tendency as well. Its not so much to win but I just HATE to lose :(..
I think its a tradeoff. Its important to play to win but sportingly. Winning shouldn't be so much of an obsession that you stop enjoying the game. I try to decide where I want to win and where I don't care. Being hyper competitive at all times can be most stressful!
For me when I play, its not so much to win but to play well. I don't mind losing a well fought out point or lose a closely fought game. What I really don't like is making random errors. I feel irritated!
I like to win too... I only enjoy the game when I am competitive and I know I have a chance to win... If I give my heart out and then I lose, I still enjoy the game, but if I am not being competitive, I might as well be in bed...
Ramani,
You don't have to comment on every post :) but anywayz, glad you understand.
B-a-l,
Thanks, I was expecting to be contradicted by a lot of people on this!
Sorry if this comment is a little stale (and long!), I came across this post only today and was tempted to post. I think there is a subtle but significant difference between wanting to get better and playing to win. IMHO, the fun is in enjoying the game. You can aim to get better, nothing wrong there, but you shouldn't have expectations about the end result. Nothing wrong with desiring things. Problem is when you expect desires to turn true and wince otherwise. That's when life becomes sad. When you have the ideal mindset, there is just plain happiness in the game. Every day is a learning experience. Win or loss will not affect you because it is not your concern. You are at the bridge club to play, playing bridge makes you happy, and life is equally blissful irrspective of whether you make a slam or fail the contract. Detatchment from the result is a very nice concept you see. This should not be confused with lack of desires or being under-competetive. The fun is in the journey, not in the end. If you think too much about the end, you're going to miss the fun on the way. When you tell yourself 'I dont care about what happens at the end', the journey suddenly becomes more enjoyable.
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