That's how old I will be tomorrow.
My birthday is usually something I mark on my blog with just a few words, wrapping it up with an indignant "See! See! That's how old I am. I'm not a kid anymore!" But not this time. I want to say more this time, because, in many ways, this has been my most difficult year. The most brutal, to be precise.
There is little point in dwelling on what happened; a lot of bad things happened, each different but related, each independently mind-numbing, but together, almost lethal. And yet, I feel obligated to at least make a note of what I did wrong. My best friend, an avid war-game strategist, put it in his characteristically blunt but accurate fashion, "Nobody can stand alone against an attack on multiple fronts." That was indeed my mistake. In my infinite ego, I believed I could put mind over matter, mind over emotion. And I believed I could do it alone.
I've come out with my body and spirit badly shaken, but with no lasting damage. I hope. My improbable saviour was actually this blog, and my blogger friends. Well... not so improbable. But I have learnt my lesson. I'll try not to bear every burden by myself. Not while I still have friends. As John Dorian would put it, "I can't do this on my own, I know, I'm no Superman."
Cheers,
Prashanth.
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
It's not enough if you have a good recipe for life. You still need a touch of magic.
About Me
- Prashanth
- Bangalore, Karnataka, India
Blogs I Read
Blogs I Write At
Site Meter
Site Feed
Creative Commons Licence
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
10 comments:
When I came to the US, the thought topmost on my mind was that I should learn to be independant, I should stop leaning on others for support(for things big and small).I have wonderful family and friends who have always been my strength.I got it into my head somehow, that it is a sign of weakness to be so dependant on others to get you out of a rut, and that you should be able to do it on your own, fight your own battles, stop being a weakling.
I faced many things which I could handle, but then came along more stuff which would have been easily 'bearable' if I had been just shared. And being as egoistic as I am, I just tried to carry on without letting anyone know .. all the little things added up and suddenly everything felt like it was too much to take and I literally broke down.
I called up one of my closest friends at that time, someone who can always make me smile inspite of how bad I am feeling, he listened to me patiently for an hour and then just said "You dont have to be that strong, you have people who care about you.Not everything can be faced alone.It doesnt mean any less of you that you seek support."
I will always remember that, while reading your post, I realised that all of us probably go through more or less the same emotions , but we all have to face the situations so we truly 'learn' our lesson.
Tough luck that your last year was hard on you, but as you look forward to the next birthday and next year, I wish for you all the happiness that you wish for and more.
Happy Birthday !
Myths
Happy birthday!
WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!
he is 24!!! Woo hoo!! All grown up :P
Happy B'day dude... Hope you have an enjoyable trip around the sun this time...
Happy B'day! Hope you have a whale of a time this year!!!!
Myths,
That sounded practically like you were plucking thoughts out of my head! Indeed, I know exactly how you mean and my experience is very similar. Of course, my ego was big to start with, so it wasn't life in the US that made me think I could do everything alone :)
Sakshi, BaL, Sounds - Thank you!
Why does everyone think not seeking support amounts to egoism? It simply means you're self reliant and independent. Who said that all those who seek support actually come out better than they were? It may give instant relief, but they merely get deluded into thinking that their problems can be solved by talking about it. It is the height of helplessness.
If one were to accept the conjecture that everyone needs help, it means that those who are sought are themselves seekers, albeit in a different manner. How can they help? It is like blind leading the blind.
To feel overwhelmed and helpless is alright, but what we do in that situation separates the wise from the so-so. If you're distressed, seek the One who has no distress and who is the remover of all sorrows. Anything else is a compromise based on ignorance.
Happy birthday, SP :)
Belated though this is Zomb, happy birthday.
Are you back in the US? If so, give me a call @ 734-272-6748 when you are free.
tata, Ranga
Hey Man!
Happy birthday. Sorry about not wishing you! I dont really come on Orkut that often so its quite hard for me to know.
John Dorian. I see you are a big fan of Scrubs. Me too! It is indeed quite funny.
How are you doing healthwise? When are you back in the US. I met Amol, Jamit and PP a few weeks back in SFO.
I am a year older than you. Imagine how I feel!
Kirthi,
You're still too young to understand... one day you will realize what Myths and I mean.
Ranga,
Long time no touch! Will be in US Aug 17th, shall call up after that.
Badger,
All fine now... we'll talk when I land there next month...
Post a Comment